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March 29, 2005

Read my mind...

Tired of waiting,
Tired of watching,
Negotiating,
Parading around.

Now you know that the girls are just making it up,
Now you know that the boys are just pushing their luck,
Now you know that my ride doesn't really exist,
And my name's not really on that list.

Can you tell that I'm planning prevenge?
Read my mind, yes, I'm planning prevenge,
At the freak show,
In the front row,
Mi amigo,
Lost in the sound.

Posted by sgowell at 10:14 AM

I should be allowed to think.

I was the worst hope of my generation
Destroyed by madness, starving, hysterical
I should be allowed to share my feelings
I should be allowed to feel


I should be allowed to glue my poster
I should be allowed to think
I should be allowed to think
I should be allowed to think
And I should be allowed to blurt the merest idea
If by random whim one occurs to me
But sadly, this can never be

I am not allowed to think
I am not allowed to think
I am not allowed to think (I am not allowed to think)
I am not allowed to think (I am not allowed to think)
I am not allowed to think (I am not allowed to think)
I am not allowed to think (I am not allowed to think)

Posted by sgowell at 07:31 AM

INNW?

The first few steps of being productive involves you getting off of your ass and doing what you need to do. I have been lax in that department for a while now, and nothing I can say can excuse that.

Things I've needed to do for a while:

Posted by sgowell at 07:15 AM

March 25, 2005

Nothing to see here...

Just me at work configuring firewalls, and trying to finish up some code deadlines.

Posted by sgowell at 06:39 AM

March 24, 2005

'It's Alpha's and Omega's Kingdom come'

Whoever is unjust, let him be unjust still.
Whoever is righteous, let him be righteous still.
Whoever is filthy, let him be filthy still.
Listen to the words long down,
When the man comes around.

Posted by sgowell at 02:53 PM

Well, there goes that.

No worries folks, Self-Confidence just went down the crapper as well.

**Update**
AND WE'RE BACK!!!!

Spilled some stuff on my pants during a quick lunch break, and ran to Meijer to pick up some other ones. Didn't want to buy any more slacks but I came across a nice pair of Carpenter pants. As it turns out they were 40x32, a size I haven't been able to fit in since high school. And they fit comfortably.

Posted by sgowell at 01:26 PM

Busy Busy Busy

Work is really going strong at the moment, and I wanted to show everybody what my desk looks like (when really busy), but unfortunately I don't have my digital camera here, so this will just have to tide you over.

Posted by sgowell at 12:15 PM

March 23, 2005

Ponder for me

How can my feelings of self-confidence be at an all-time high, whereas my feelings of self-worth be at an all-time low?

Posted by sgowell at 07:51 AM

March 22, 2005

Eustress and Distress Both

My ability to handle the various stressors imposed upon me on a daily basis has been lacking of late. I have done things out of character for me, and I have done things that only weeks ago I would have found both morally reprehensible, and socially unacceptable. I have hurt people, and I have also been painfully truthful to people I care a great deal about.

Some major life decisions are on the horizon, so I will do my best to keep everyone informed. But the scariest part is, I am 23 years old, I am an adult, and ultimately, it is up to me.

Posted by sgowell at 07:45 AM

March 17, 2005

Just Pretend

While I held you with our undry eyes
Have the years pass by, it's ok to cry
After all, in the end, just pretend

Well it's sticks and stones and broken homes
That taught us how to smile
After all, in the end, just pretend

There's a name that plays in my head like a song
All day long she's with me everyday
After all, in the end, just pretend

The Bens - Just Pretend

Posted by sgowell at 02:27 PM | Comments (0)

March 15, 2005

I am not one to quote the bible...

So as you may well know, we have the Alpha Geek award at work that goes to the person who is the most geeky for that month. Well, I bought a hat from Thinkgeek.com and have been wearing it all day.

Someone came in to my office during the latter part of the day and asked to look at my hat, and then said "Scott, with that hat, 'we' have decided to name you the Omega geek", and me without thinking responded with, "I am the Alpha and the Omega", which in hindsight was a little over the top.

Now, I admit, I have never been a real religious person, and I have never read all of the Bible. But apparently during Revelations, this is something that God says a couple times. Now, I have heard this quote in other places *cough*Transformers: Beast Wars*cough*, but now I am kinda concerned that I might get smoten.

Posted by sgowell at 04:25 PM | Comments (0)

Ever have one of those moments?

"Scissor Sisters - Take Your Mama"

When you grow up
Livin' like a good boy oughta
And your mama
Takes a shine to her best son
Something different
All the girls they seem to like you
Cause you're handsome
Like to talk and a whole lot of fun

But now your girl's gone a missin'
And your house has got an empty bed
The folks'll wonder 'bout the wedding
They won't listen to a word you said

Posted by sgowell at 09:20 AM | Comments (0)

March 14, 2005

Another day, another doldrum

My work situation is still in flux. It looks like we might be down one programmer indefinately, though we might pick up our own IT person. This would cut down on my Network/Firewall/Backup/Server Administration tasks, but there will still be a learning curve for a while with the new person. The ad went out on Sunday and they expect to have interviews by next week.

2 tasks done today, Nice lunch with Andy and some CCS employees, got the paperwork settled for the reimbursement stuff for the cabling I have bought for work, and this week is a pay week.

Better than a kick in the teeth I guess.

Posted by sgowell at 04:03 PM | Comments (0)

March 08, 2005

The Cheat is Overwhelmed....

I knew it wouldn't last.

Posted by sgowell at 09:20 AM | Comments (0)

March 07, 2005

*Song of the Moment*

The Seatbelts - Gotta Knock a Little Harder

Posted by sgowell at 03:49 PM | Comments (0)

It's Raining?

I was awoke this morning not by my alarm clock, but by the sound of rain on my window. Though I am concerned that we might see significant ice formation overnight, I will admit that the it was a welcome change. However, this sudden temperature shift will only add to my time in the land of the neverending sinus infection. Perhaps I should shave my head again, as it could simply be my Reverse-Sampson issue.

This weekend was fun. I spent a fair amount of time out of the house, not doing anything particularly exciting, but it was cool overall. Got to hang out with the Fortress folks outside of playing Heroclix. I kicked major butt at 'Scene It?' and 'Cranium', but was not too productive at 'Munchkin / Star Munchkin'.

Posted by sgowell at 09:28 AM | Comments (0)

March 03, 2005

I think it's going to be a good day.

I don't know what happened this morning, but I am in a particularly good mood today.

Times are tough all around, I understand that I am not the only one experiencing some relationship difficulties (I hope things go better for you soon Ginger!), some people are in a state of worry (It will all work out Charlie!).

Life is harsh some times, but at least I don't have Cataplexy.

**Update**
I am super productive today! I got 2 projects finished before lunchtime.

Posted by sgowell at 09:32 AM | Comments (0)

March 02, 2005

Cellar Door

Just watched Donnie Darko for the first time. I was pretty impressed. It was the director's cut, so I don't know if makes any difference. It's a "Mad World" I guess.

Posted by sgowell at 07:30 PM | Comments (0)