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August 27, 2005
Hard to believe....
Ohhhhh It's a long, long rope they use to hang you soon I hope And I wonder why this hasn't happened Why why why And I think about the dirt that I'll be wearing for a shirt And I hope that I get old before I dieI thought a long time ago that I had met the woman of my dreams. I spent 5+ years with her, and I thought that we would eventually be married etc. Before February of this year if anyone had asked where I expected to be within the next few years, I thought that it would include her, and our relationship and our life together.
Well, now that the hostilites have passed, I realize that it was never going to work. I don't know whether or not I was providing what I needed to, or that she couldn't handle the distance of our relationship and my mood due to my feelings toward work etc.
Why Scott would you bring this up? Well ... I am scared. I am worried that I am going to fuck something up with my current relationship. Barb is hands down the most beautiful, intelligent, wonderful person I have ever met. My job is a primary reason for ending my former relationship, and if I lost Barb too I would probably not be long for this world. She has made me the happiest I have ever been in my life. I really feel that I am becoming a better person for having known her.
I love you so much Barb. I know that you know, but I still like saying it. I haven't been happy in a long time, and that has changed. For about 2 months I have understood what love can be.
Posted by sgowell at 08:19 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
August 26, 2005
You can't always get what you want...
But if you try sometimes you might find, you get what you need.
Thanks Six Apart! Movable 3.2 is beautiful, and comments/trackbacks are back on new entries.
TypeKey required folks.
Gowell...Out
Posted by sgowell at 08:59 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
August 18, 2005
This is not my beautiful job...
Email from a contractor gave me the opportunity to do a 3 year project with Microsoft if I wanted to code C++. Not my cup of tea really. I would love the opportunity to work for MS, but C++ is not my speciality. I have been getting a lot of calls and emails lately about contract positions. I am wondering if the industry is currently in a restructuring period or what. It seems that a lot of people are hiring old school programmers. Where are the web application developer jobs at? Or are those jobs filled by the old school programmers and that is why they need to be replaced?
Posted by sgowell at 10:24 AM
I couldn't sleep at all last night...
Doo Doo Do Do Doo.
Funniest thing really. I recently traded up my bed with my folks (they are upgrading), and I have been able to fall asleep quicker, but I seem to be waking up in the middle of the night. Guess I need to tire myself out more, or go to bed later. Results to follow.
Posted by sgowell at 10:21 AM
August 09, 2005
...The Universe and Everything
I had just an absolutely spectacular weekend with Barb. I really enjoy all the time I get to spend with her. It is just a pity that it mandates a 6 hour drive (round trip) for either of us.
Saturday was geek day. We went to Best Buy and the Computer Haus to get her some stuff for her Mac, and we spent a good part of the evening cataloging stuff in Delicious Library (what a great program). Had a great dinner with Barb's Mom at her Uncle's place north of Traverse City. Got some excellent pictures taken, and managed to troubleshoot my way into her family's heart.
Sunday was a relaxing day. We drove around Traverse, Sutton's Bay, Leland. We toured downtown Sutton's Bay, took a look at all the interesting shops there, and had a great discussion of Pirates vs. Ninjas. We walked on the beach hand-in-hand in Leland, and then stopped by Barb's house.
I know that I am being brief, but I just want to keep the rest of the memories for myself. I know that may sound a bit selfish, but hey, she's my girl, and I don't feel like sharing the rest. :)
Posted by sgowell at 06:57 AM
August 01, 2005
Commence Fetal Position
Work ... Work ... Work ...
Politics ... Politics ... Politics ...
Stress ... Stress ... Stress ...
Paranoia ... Paranoia ... Paranoia ...
"Here's the part where Cameron goes berserk. ---FBDO"
Posted by sgowell at 03:41 PM